Printer Humor
Here is a follow-up on last weeks article, "Removing Ink Stains".
Thomas Fair writes in and says, "Goo Gone removes Magic Marker and other ink stains".
Cliff Steele and Terence Wesson agrees that, "One of the best for removing [ink] from hands and skin is plain old chlorine bleach".
Cliff Steele adds that lemon juice and soap works wonders. "Use distilled water to rinse if available, it really works".
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I hope none of you work for Pitney Bowes because I'm about to slam them.
They took us to the cleaners for the last time. After we signed on with them our postage costs SOARED out of control even after they promised to save us money. They lied in their presentation and they are impossible
to communicate with if something goes wrong. Lots went wrong for us and all I can say is it was a nightmare to get out of all the contracts and
legal stuff. I'm really biting my tongue here, I had to edit this a few times
so I wouldn't offend anybody. I was happy to stand in line again at the post office with huge bags of packages just so I wouldn't have to deal
with Pitney Bowes again.
All my prayers were answered when I stumbled upon Endicia. They are a web based postage site that offers 10 times what PB does at a fraction of the cost. I was hesitant to sign up with them because of what I went through. After reading their web site I sent them an email and asked, "Why can't I find anything wrong with you?", "What's the catch?" They politely explained that they were for real and there is no catch. I've been with them for two months now and I can't tell you how pleased I am with their service. If you need an inexpensive solution to your postage problem I urge you to take a look at these people. More information here:
http://atlascopy.com/endicia.htm
Here are some true stories from help desks. They are not from my personal experience even though many are written in the first
person.
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A man attempting to set up his new printer called the printer's tech support number, complaining about the error message: "Can't find the printer." On the phone, the man said he even held the printer up in front of the screen, but the computer still couldn't find it.
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A woman called the Canon help desk, about a problem she was having with her printer. The tech asked her if she was "running it under
Windows." The woman responded, "No, my desk is next to the door. But that's a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his is working just fine."
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I had been doing Tech Support for Hewlett-Packard's DeskJet division for about a month when I had a customer call with a problem I just
couldn't solve. She could not print yellow. All the other colors would print fine, which truly baffled me because the only true colors are
cyan, magenta, and yellow. For instance, green is a combination of cyan and yellow, but green printed fine. Every color of the rainbow
printed fine except for yellow. I had the customer change ink cartridges. I had the customer delete and reinstall the drivers. Nothing
worked. I asked my coworkers for help; they offered no new ideas. After over two hours of troubleshooting, I was about to tell the customer to send the printer in to us for repair when she asked quietly, "Should I try
printing on a piece of white paper instead of this yellow paper?"
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Caller: Hi, um, my printer smells funny and it's smoking.
Tech: Well, have you turned it off?
Caller: Well, no, I was told never to turn it off without running it through shutdown and it won't go through shutdown.
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When my printer's type began to grow faint, I called a local repair shop where a friendly man informed me that the printer probably needed only to be cleaned. Because the store charged $50 for such cleanings, he told me, I might be better off reading the printer's manual and trying the job myself. Pleasantly surprised by his candor, I asked, "Does your boss know that you discourage business?" "Actually, it's my boss's idea," the employee replied sheepishly. "We usually make more money on
repairs if we let people try to fix things themselves first."
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Till next time.
Happy printing
Barry Shultz
Atlascopy, Inc.
PO Box 1292
Dover, DE. 19904
http://atlascopy.com
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